From the best electronic toy cum geek fetish blog on the net, Engadget, here’s a link to a site that’s written a massive history of the Transformers. Not a history of Transformers-related products, mind you, but a history of the entire Transformers Universe. Here’s a taste of what to expect…

In the beginning, in dimension filled with life energy, called Zone Energy, there was only one Spark (or Lasercore), spawned from primal energies of that plane. The Original Spark (or Lasercore) had the ability to merge with any machine and become its central nervous system in order to give that machine life. Its offspring shared this ability. It divided into several smaller sparks, each possessing unimaginable power. Some of these sparks were violent and territorial, while others were peaceful and benevolent and shunned their brutal siblings. Many of the brutal sparks left the Zone Dimension, spread out across the universe, while the benevolent ones remained behind, growing in wisdom and knowledge.

The violent sparks devoured all life and destroyed all matter they encountered, growing stronger and stronger. When there was no matter left to devour they turned on each other. Most were destroyed or devoured by a powerful, dark spark. Some of the violent ones fled to other dimensions to escape the dark spark. Evetually all matter was destroyed and all life in the universe devoured, and that was left was the dark spark. Finally contented, the dark spark slumbered.

Read the rest for yourself here. I’m not terribly fluent in Transformers lore, so I can’t vouch for the accuracy of the online tome, but I’m sure it’ll spark many a late night academic debate in chat rooms across the globe.

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