This schmuck got himself arrested the other day for climbing a Houston building. He calls himself Spiderman, but doesn’t even have the balls to wear the costume. Probably a good thing since Spidey would never touch Xanax - no need to ruin a perfectly cultivated sense of guilt!

The French building climber who calls himself “Spiderman” was thwarted in a bid to scale a Houston skyscraper and charged with trespassing and possessing drugs — two pills to relieve anxiety.

Robert Alain Philippe, 43, was arrested Tuesday as he was to begin climbing the 678-foot-tall 1 Houston Center building. Houston police spokesman John Cannon said two tablets, believed to be the sedative Xanax, were found on Philippe.

Spread the word!