Halloweiners
Author: AF Duncan
October 31st, 2006

As most of you know, it’s Hallo-fu*&ing-ween, which in ancient Druidic translates as “yet another marketing opportunity.” For serious, we love us some Halloween and we also love us some horror movie-age. So, in the interests of it being a school night and all, Dan and I thought we’d recommend some of our favorite fright flicks to those of you relegated to the casa. But if you’re anywhere near NYC, you should check out the Village Halloween Parade because that’s a serious good time if you don’t mind crowds and getting fondled.
Anyway, from D. Brooks:
1. House of 1000 Corpses
While not as good as its semi-sequel The Devil’s Rejects, House of 1000 Corpses a helluva lot scarier and more disturbing, with a great visual flair. I watched this for the first time on a rainy night, alone, at 1 in the morning. Simultaneously, one of the best and worst decisions I’ve ever made.
2. Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Possibly the best horror film of the ‘70s. Grainy and dirty, with an almost documentary feel, this is one of the most stomach churning films of all time.
3. Garbage Pail Kids: The Movie
A kids movie. Right. The Garbage Pail Kids look frightening – they’re good old fashioned nightmare fuel, as far as I’m concerned – and the movie itself is a scarier sight to behold.
4. I Spit on Your Grave
Don’t watch this one with your neighbors in earshot, like this genius writer did.
5. Land of the Dead
It’s not the comic book shoot ‘em up that Dawn of the Dead is, nor is it as eye opening as Night of the Living Dead, but George Romero’s latest gore fest has good acting, great effects, and a compelling story. It’s under-appreciated now, but will become a cult classic.
As for me, I second Dan’s votes, and off the top of my head you can’t go wrong with any of the following:
-I’m not the biggest J-horror fan in the world, but Audition, Pulse, or Cure are worth a look
-anything by Cronenberg, especially Shivers, Dead Ringers, The Fly, or Videodrome
-anything by David Lynch (well, not Straight Story…)
-early Peter Jackson: Bad Taste, Dead Alive
-most Romero, Fulci, or Argento
-Exorcist Director’s Cut (far superior to the original, in my opinion), or a couple other weirdo late 60s/early 70s psycho-sexual flicks: Rosemary’s Baby, Repulsion, The Wicker Man, Straw Dogs, Robert Wise’s The Haunting or Don’t Look Now
-to rock more old school, pick up anything produced by Val Lewton or directed by Tod Browning — Freaks always kills
-Two truly brilliant films that time has been especially kind to: The Shining and Alien
-I have soft spots for Scream, Halloween, Carpenter’s The Thing and The Fog, Se7en, Lost Boys, Dog Soldiers, 28 Days Later, Bubba Ho-Tep
-the Charlie Brown Halloween Special is terrifying in its own way
…am I out of time yet?
I know we’re probably preaching to the choir here, but hope you find something you like, peoples. If anyone has another recommendation, please mention it! Happy Halloween, chums.
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16 Responses to “Halloweiners”






November 1st, 2006 at 3:47 am
Nice to see somebody say something nice about LAND OF THE DEAD.Not the ultimate zombie apocolypse some of us waited 20 years for; but it’s the best film John Carpenter never made…
November 1st, 2006 at 6:24 am
Land of the Dead was way underrated. One of the best films of last year, I thought. Same with Devil\’s Rejects. There\’s a lot of crappy horror lately, but some great stuff, too.
November 1st, 2006 at 7:06 am
I thought Land was fun, but not as good as y’all make out. Maybe I’ll watch it again this week on OnDemand during baby feeding times.
I’d also include the TCM remake. Yeah, it’s slicker than the original, but it still revels in the awesome nastiness of the early 70s slasher flicks.
November 1st, 2006 at 7:32 am
I thought the TCM remake was okay — stranely, like a lot of modern day horror movies, it focued on torture. Which is fine, but not my cup o’ horror-tea. Definitely gross though, which I enjoyed.
Is Romero still going ahead with his 5th zombie flick? It’s supposed to be Blair Witch meets zombies, which sounds…very, very lame.
November 1st, 2006 at 7:36 am
Oh, plus, Land of the Dead has Asia Argento. A fact that makes it automatically good.
November 1st, 2006 at 7:39 am
There’s an easy term paper just waiting to be written on all the recent horror films that emphasize torture.
November 1st, 2006 at 7:41 am
If you happpen to have the Starz OnDemand package, they’re running a nice little documantary on the rise, fall, rise, fall and current rise again of the horror/slasher film. Not a term paper, but very, very interesting.
November 1st, 2006 at 7:42 am
I actually bought the pimped-out TCM remake on DVD last week. Circuit City had it on sale for a cheap $4.99, and I couldn’t pass.
November 1st, 2006 at 7:54 am
Anyone see the TCM prequel? I heard it was horrible.
November 1st, 2006 at 7:57 am
Awesome, I think we do get the Starz OnDemand channel… Anyone seen Hostel?
November 1st, 2006 at 8:12 am
It’s in my Netflix queue. I liked Cabin Fever, so I’m kinda excited to see it.
November 1st, 2006 at 8:26 am
I really need to try Cabin Fever again. I keep hearing good stuff about it, but was unab le to get past the first 20 minutes or so.
Not seen Hostel, heard mixed about it, bu that’s typical for horror movies.
November 1st, 2006 at 8:50 am
Another dude told me Cabin Fever was one of the worst horror movies he’d ever seen, so I’ve avoided it. The same guy liked Hostel, so, we shall see.
November 1st, 2006 at 9:34 am
To be fair, the “good stuff” isn’t exactly a ringing endorsement so much as it’s a “You have to see this shit to believe it” type thing.
I really need to start plowing through the J-horror stuff I have sitting around here. Just really hard to watch subtitled stuff while feeding the baby or trying to get work done while waiting for the baby to wake up from a nap.
November 1st, 2006 at 10:44 am
I find much of what I’ve seen of the J-horror (which isn’t a lot, I admit) to be a bit overrated, personally. They tend to start off really well and then not go anywhere, and they often take themselves too seriously without saying anything about anything. Kind of like anime, I guess.
That said, also like anime, there are a few real gems to be found. “Audition” is one for the time capsule, that’s for sure.
November 1st, 2006 at 2:48 pm
Hostel took way too long to get going and then when you got there, the ride suddenly ended. Eli’s one of those cats (IMHO) who thinks he’s more clever and funnier than he actually is-however, I do dig his new teaser trailer for Hostel 2.